This Just In!

mcskWe have it on good authority that an animated “Kat” is going to replace Paula Abdul on American Idol‘s 9th season! The “story” broke on Twitter (a free social networking and micro-blogging service for 12 year old girls and lonely middle age men) Tuesday night!

Paulatweeted” some incoherent nonsense filled with numbers and symbols that we couldn’t make heads or tails of….luckily, 7th grader and regular Fetish Fridays reader, Cynthia Wheeler (age 12), was able to decipher the drunken text-based post by the former Mrs. Estevez.

mcsk2It says she’s sad and stuff about leaving the show or whatever and, uh, that some really old cartoon cat from the 80s is gonna’ be the new judge,” explained Cynthia via her cellular telephone early this morning.

We here at Awesomeness couldn’t be more thrilled about the exciting new opportunities that could be opening up for both Paula and American Idol!

I don’t know about y’all but, we’ve got our fingers crossed for a “almost 50 and still sexyPaula Playboy pictorial and a celebrity sex tape scandal involving MC Skat Kat and Kara DioGuardi

But until then, let’s watch this “awesome” video from American Idol’s new judge:

It’s No Fun…

Supergay!

Supergay!

ARGH! When will we ever learn? Always set the dvr to record longer than an hour when American Idol is involved!

Last night’s theme was Songs From The Year They Were Born…and The Wife and I suffered through the mediocrity to get to one contestant:

Adam “Supergay” Lambert!

But did we get to see him? Oh no, my friends! The stupid show ran long…soooooo, I can only guess what Supergay performed…

Let’s see…according to the internets, he’s either 26 or 27…that puts his DOB at 1982 or 1983…

Okay…think, Canacorn, think!

The other contestants bored the shit out of you with tracks by Ben E. King, Don Henley, Tina Turner, Cyndi Lauper, Survivor, Stevie Wonder, and Bonnie fucking Raitt…so it only makes sense that Supergay would up the ante and bring some entertainment and maybe a bit of humor to the proceedings…

But it has to be a song that would really wow the judges…

I got it!

Alright, I’ll cover my bases here and go with a song that was recorded in 1982 and released in 83.

It’s a a light, humorous depiction of the frustrations of being an illegal immigrant in the US…but since it’s a satire, no one should be offended…even if Supergay sings it with a mock-Mexican accent dressed in a huge sombrero and serape, complete with a giant fake mustache and a cute chihuahua in his arms.

So, my guess for Adam “Supergay” Lambert‘s Song From The Year They Were Born is none other than…

Man, am I a genius or what? Wait….he sang Mad World….oh, that kinda’ makes more sense.

High Fivin’ With Ryan!

Okay, so American Idol is a really big deal at Casa Canacorn…and tonight was a great first episode…thanks to the last 5 minutes.

In case you missed it, I snapped a couple of photos off the tee-vee.

The set up:

The contestant’s name is Scott. He is blind. He got his Golden Ticket to Hollywood.

Ryan thought it would be a good time to celebrate Scott’s victory:

Put it up there!

Put it up there!

Here’s what’s happening in my living room:

The Dr. is NOT amused.

The Dr. is NOT amused.

Ryan will not give up:

Yeah!  That's it!  Down low!

Yeah! That's it! Down low!

But wait! Not all is lost! Scott truly is an inspiration:

Indomitable Spirit!

Indomitable Spirit!

Um, hey, Ryan…He’s blind…NOT retarded.

Two For Tuesdays

Here’s a Canacorn fun fact: AMERICAN IDOL is a big deal at our house. We even went to the 1st AI concert waaaaay back in 2002….seriously love the show.

Anyway, this year during the Hollywood auditions, one of the songs the contestants could sing was Everything I Do…remember that one? It was like the wedding song of 1991-1994. It’s an okay song I guess.

When The Wife hears Bryan Adams she automatically thinks of Cuts Like A Knife.

When I hear Bryan Adams I automatically think of the great American singer/songwriter JOHN COUGAR MELLENCAMP!

So, this Tuesday, we’re going huntin’ for a couple of cougars!

HURTS SO GOOD

Can you believe I thought those biker chicks were hot? Yikes.

JACK AND DIANE