King Of The Latin Beat

Maestro of Mambo

Maestro of Mambo

While I too am saddened by the loss of Khan and Number Six, let us not forget CUBAN PETE.

He may not be as well remembered in the nerd circles as those other two, but he’s just as awesome in my book.

Pedro Aguilar– June 14, 1927 – January 13, 2009

Why should you care?

He was The Greatest Mambo Dancerever.

And even though he wasn’t Cuban he did inspire one of the greatest songs ever.

Chick chicky boom, chick chicky boom, indeed.

Fetish Fridays! NSFW As Usual

Dr. ASFRian hard at work.

Dr. ASFRian hard at work.

OMFG, look who decided to come on back this Friday!

I thought after last week I’d never see your shining face again. Well, I’m glad you’re here…and today, I’m gonna’ go easy on you.

There will NOT be any overly-engorged genitalia on Awesomeness this Friday…I promise.

Nope, today is all about ASFR, or Technosexuality if your all nerdly, or we can just call it Robot Fetishism, if that makes you feel less intimidated.

Now, I know you’re all, “Wha’? Look Canacorn, I’m not down with that freak-a-deak Fucking Machines website, so don’t even start with videos of the Vulvulator, Autozipper, or the dreaded Fucksall this morning!

Alright, alright, Gawd!

That’s not what this fetish is about anyway! What we have here is “…a fetishistic attraction to humanoid or non-humanoid robots; also to people acting like robots or people dressed in robot costumes. A less common fantasy involves transformation into a robot.

This robot prefers a chair over Paul's Bench.

This robot prefers a chair over Paul's Bench.

You see, some people like to get all Shields and Yarnell when they do the nasty!

These technosexuals get all hot under the pocket protector when thinking about having sex with a robot…and just like us regular folks, none of them want to fuck a Penny, they want a Hope or a Heather…or in their case, a Pris or a Number Six.

Sorry, Aqua Com 89045….get lost, Vera Webster, most ASFRians would rather set their phasers to erect and plug into a Borg than play with your mechanical manholes.

Like all other fetishes, this dorky fetish has some common themes to help set the mood for hot robo-sex-play! Here’s some examples from WinterRose:

START-UP & SHUT-DOWN: In this regard, the Technosexual will percieve the imagined person to be activated or deactivated in all sorts of ways.

MENTAL STATE: There’s an inherent submissive or dominant quality to the robotic.

MOTION AND IMMOBILITY: In some fantasy, robots are not as mobile or as articulate as we human beings are. They move like… Well, like a bunch of clunky robots! Movements can seem stilted. Measured. They can happen with great precision and machine-like grace… or clumsiness.

MALFUNCTION: Let’s face it folks. Robots can seem perfect. But when they go wrong, it becomes VERY obvious what they really are. A twitching, half melted, stuttering, limb-detached, smoking, or erratically behaving robot calls attention to the fact that they ARE a robot.

APPEARANCE: The old saying goes, if it walks like a duck, squawks like a duck, and looks like a duck, it’s likely a duck. The same goes with robots for Technosexuals. The overt appearance of being robotic can take many forms, but will never fail to get some positive reaction out of your circuit-imprinted (As opposed to dyed-in-the-wool) Techno.

Hurm, that’s cool I guess. So, when the Technos aren’t busy jerking it to old robot pin-ups or making believe they’re robots, what else do they do with their spare time? Why, they write erotic robot fiction, duh! Like this excerpt from The Robo-Lover by Nova:

Do I mak3 y0u h-h-h-h0rneeee?

Do I mak3 y0u h-h-h-h0rneeee?

The two moved to his bedroom where they finished undressing each other. He sat on the bed while she stood next to it. Jason caressed her silky skin and rubbed her breasts as he licked her belly. He raised an eyebrow in surprise when he noticed she had absolutely no navel. He smiled, it was yet another reminder that she was indeed not a human. Nova reached down and caressed his head and kissed him. He reached down and ran his fingers along her sex. It was warm, wet and inviting. He reached out for her and turned her around and layed her on the bed on her back. He began to rub and touch her while she caressed his member. He licked and nuzzled at her hairless sex, and was ecstatic when he discovered that it too had a nice cherry flavor and scent to it. Occasionaly he would glance at her exposed mechanics and be spurred to greater ecstasy as he was fulfilling a deep seated fetish in himself.

Oh man, I don’t know about you, but my circuitry is about to overheat! I think I’ll leave you with one last image and a link to a cool NSFW video about ASFR.

Number 5 is alive...and all up in your vagina!

Number 5 is alive...and all up in your vagina!

Now go watch THIS!