Rings, Bitches!

Stunning poster, huh? I remember staring slack jawed at it way back in 1978. As a kid I loved walking past the wall of NOW SHOWING and COMING SOON posters on the way to the ticket booth at our local theater….and after the films, my folks would indulge me in stopping by every poster again on the way to the car.

I was only six in 1978, so I hadn’t read THE RINGS yet, but I was somehow familiar with the story…and that poster…wow. It wasn’t until Bakshi’s RINGS made it’s way to the small screen, did I get to see Middle-earth come to life.

But this isn’t a review of Bakshi’s film…just a quick pit stop down memory lane. Today, I was feeling a bit geeky so I put on the 1978 LOTR soundtrack.

Truthfully, I didn’t really remember any musical cues or even the “Theme From Lord Of The Rings”, but I did get a memory jolt when the “Helm’s Deep” track started. That doesn’t mean I was disappointed with Leonard Rosenman’s score, actually, it was pretty damn exciting. Strangely enough, the more I listened to RINGS the more I kept thinking of the PLANET OF THE APES films. Imagine my surprise when I did a little nosing around on the interweb and found out that Mr. Rosenman scored both BENEATH and BATTLE ape films. Cool, right?

Anyway, the LOTR lp is a nifty gatefold with some awesome interior art:

Here’s a quick snippet of the Orcs at helm’s Deep:

Rewatching that little piece makes it perfectly clear why that music has stuck with me…I’m kind of a sucker for chanting…must be the Roman Catholic in me.

Oh, I also found this 6 minute video (strictly for all you nerds out there):

The Untold Story Of Ralph Bakshi’s Return of the King

Fim by: Scott Jonston

C’mon, Bakshi, get off your ass and put out Big Titty Girls Meet Spiderman, already!

Gorillanauts….ARE GO!

Hey kids, do you even know who Joi Lansing is?

No?

Watch this:

Do any of the following references in this review of I KNOW WHO KILLED ME make any sense to you?

“The whole plot reminded me of something DePalma might’ve tried back in the eighties or even during his inexplicable RAISING CAIN. I suppose the twin gimmick was meant to have a big shocking twist feel but you never really buy into it. LL never does anything shocking or sexy, not enough to even get the “I just wanna see her naked” crowd. There’s something approaching a giallo feel in the killer’s house where LL comes across a creepy cellar of hanging prosthetic limbs but Sivertson doesn’t have the chops to make it special. It really needed to be weirder, maybe in the style of an early seventies giallo, where the ludicrous plot gimmick would just be something you rolled with because the visuals and music were so trippy and cool. But Sivertson is no Argento. It’s also not “bad” enough like a SHOWGIRLS to interest the camp crowd. Personally, I would’ve like to see a deranged chimp in there somewhere. It’s not really LL’s fault, she does what she can I suppose. It’s just not enough of anything. Just go watch DRESSED TO KILL instead. At least it has Michael Caine in drag.”
-Bwana Beast

Yes?
No…but you’re curious?

Then check out my new favorite movie / entertainment website: Gorillanaut!


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