Goodbye, Old Chums.

Well, the day has come…The Wife and I are finally Netflix users.

Why now? Well…this is hard for me…the video store that I’ve frequented for a decade is closing it’s doors next month.

It’s true, the Waterloo Video annex is soon to be no more. I’m bummed for a few reasons. Of course I’ll miss the free rentals and discounts, but the real shame is that some really cool people are not going to be part of my daily routine anymore. Oh sure, some of my video friends are coming over to the record store, but some are going their own way…choosing not to be part of the dying art that is the record store employee. We’ve had some good times together…and I’m seriously going to be bummed. Good luck to all you kooky kids…I guess we can keep in touch on MySpace or something.

It’s strange to watch some of my fellow record store employees rape the shelves over at the video store and never once stop to think how this might be affecting the people who actually work over there. It’s not like it’s just some store going out of business…it’s our store. Time to wake up and smell the coffee. Next time it could be us (scratch that…next time it WILL BE us)…and I hope the people we work with can muster up some fucking sympathy as they buy all the cheap product to plump up their collections or their eBay accounts to actually care about the people who’s lives are drastically going to change in less than a month.

Alright…I know I don’t usually get all mushy, so I’ll stop. Netflix…I guess it’s the future. Or maybe it’s downloading movies? Whatever. So far I’m pretty excited about my new way of “renting” movies. I’ll miss the endless browsing I’m capable of in an actual store…but browsing online isn’t the worst thing I suppose. I’ll also miss the infinite knowledge possessed by the soon to be extinct video clerk…and that kinda’ sucks.

Welcome to the future, Mr. Canacorn, hope you like it without some of your friends around!

Oh, Daddy Merrill, if you’re reading this, please tell the ‘Loo video kids to hit me up on MySpace.

Lover’s Spat….

So, the other night The Wife and I started watching THE STAIRCASEoh, wait…don’t tell me how it ends! We haven’t finished it yet…anyway, it’s totally fucking awesome and all that.

Now when I’m watching something I get all obsessive and talk about it at great lengths in a very excitable manner…lots of loud talking, wild gesticulations, acting out scenes…seriously, I get all hyper and weird…but I’m a pretty good verbal storyteller (I’m Irish), so it’s a ton of fun…for me.

Anyway, my buddy, Jon, recommended this mini-series so I felt the need to fill him in on where I was at in the story…this involves me retelling the entire first two episodes to the poor guy who’s already seen the damn thing…but he’s cool with it…he knows how I am. This is what he looks like:


Hello, boys!

Just to refresh your memory…this is me:


I love me some meat in my mouth!

So were outside of work (oh, real quick, he works at our sister video store) and I’m going all crazy-nuts about the show and I get to the part when the lawyer starts grilling his client to prepare him for the prosecution’s assault. The lawyer starts asking the guy about his gay affairs and the guy’s all talking around the subject so his lawyer starts yelling, “Did you give him a blowjob? Did you give him a blowjob?!

You got the part where we’re outside…in public..and I get very loud and excitable, right? Okay, so I’m all up in Jon’s face, practically stabbing him in the eye with my index finger, screaming about blowjobs when a young lady sipping a frappuccino walks by…you see where this is going now? Good.

So she says, “Oh my!” like she can’t even help herself and walks away real quick like from the bear and his cub’s little lover’s spat.

Nice, huh? I yelled after her that I was talking about a tee vee show, but she just gave me a “Yeah, right,” and hotfooted it away from the crazy gay guys fighting about blowjobs.

Oh well…I hope she had a good story to tell for the rest of her day…I know I did.