Fetish Fridays! The NSFW Animation Edition

Hey wow, it’s The Simpsons!

The Simpsons? At Fetish Fridays!?What in the wide, wide world of sports is a going on here? I hired you people to try to get a little track laid, not to jump around like a bunch of Kansas City faggots!

Heh…Blazing Saddles?

Anyone?

Um…..And speaking of laying track, ever wanted to see characters from “the most irreverent and unapologetic show on the air” get all porny and freaky with each other in all sorts of way wrong situations?

Sure you do! Everyone loves The Simpsons!

I’ll start you off with an easy one, okay?

Feeling a little weird?

Kind of fucked up right? Well, let me tell you, you haven’t seen nothin’ yet! And get this, I’m gonna’ go real easy on you today (except for the last two images at the end of this post…there will only be one more warning)…I will be staying away from the incest and the underage stuff (just Google that yourself, sick-o…and it doesn’t make it okay ’cause they’re cartoons)…but we are gonna’ get a little gay and things are certainly not going to be acceptable in any way, shape, or form…

Not acceptable

Like this image.

And why is this not acceptable? Because we all know that it should be Poochie bangin’ Marge on the kitchen floor and not Santa’s Little Helper…duh.

God, who draws this stuff for the internet?

Dear internet, please provide me with more Poochie porn as quickly as possible.
Love, Mr. Canacorn XOXO

Nothing? Okay, then…moving on. What could be next? HMMMMM…Since we’ve covered bestiality, let’s go with the whole shemale phenomena next!

I know, I know, you can’t throw a rock at the internet these days without hitting some tranny in her erect cock…(just wait until next Friday…)

Marge have penis? That’s unpossible.

Wow. I ask again, who draws this stuff for the internet?

Here’s a better question: Who looks at this stuff on the internet?

Here’s an even better question: Who in the fuck pays $39.95 a month to look at Simpson Porn on the internet?! $39.95?! A month?! Are you fucking brain damaged? What the fuck is wrong with you?!

Sorry….I don’t mean to freak out on Fetish Fridays. I know I say “we don’t judge here at Awesomeness“, but the internet is making it real fucking hard for me to keep my cool and be “okay” with all the weird crap the internet people are into these days.

Seriously, sometimes I just have to wonder what in the fuck is wrong with some people?

Sigh…Moving on!

That's right...just cartoon dicks.

Let’s get all crazy-gay up in this party of wrongness, huh?

Bet you thought I’d be going with Mr. Burns and Smithers (too obvious) or even Itchy and Scratchy (like that could even happen)…but I liked the composition and message of this one with Apu and Homer…and it’s got hot dogs in it (MMMMM, hot dogs).

I found it on a site called Just Cartoon Dicks.com!

Just. Cartoon. Dicks. Who knew?

Alright, I’ve had just about as much as I can stand…but I know I promised you guys not one, but two, final images today.

I also promised y’all a warning.

THIS IS YOUR WARNING! THE NEXT 2 IMAGES ARE ERO GURO.

Not sure what that means? Well, click the link (don’t worry, it will take you to Wikipedia) or feast your eyes on this:

It's no Yoshitoshi...

And, my favorite:

It's all about the scissors for me.

My work is done here…

A Very Penus Christmas

Who's the blockhead now, Lucy?

You know, I’ve never really been a big fan of Charles M. Schulz‘s so-called “psychologically complex” and “indelible” comic strip, Peanuts.

Actually, the comic strip that ran during the 50s does contain some beautiful art and decent writing (not as good as Andy Capp though…heh, Andy Capp…his name’s a pun on handicap…oh, man…)…it’s the Peanuts from the 70s and 80s that I really just didn’t get then and certainly don’t get now.

Oh settle down you fucking jackals! Like that’s the worst thing you’ve ever heard? It’s not like I professed my love for murdering children and raping old ladies! I just never got into some stupid cartoon about some depressed bald kid who had shitty friends and boring adventures.

I mean, really? Why watch that when I could watch something like this?

Did you see that? Savagery, Super-Science, and Sorcery!

Fucking Thundarr rules!

But I digress…Back to that blockhead, Charlie Brown. Maybe I could give Charlie another chance..but only if it wasn’t animated, had porn star, Belladonna, as Lucy, was written and directed by James Gunn, contained some sex, and ended with Charlie Brown systematically slaughtering every last one of these incredibly boring Schulz characters.

Sound too good to be true?

Feast your eyes on this this:

Now that’s what I’m talking about! Thanks, Mr. Gunn, for making this a wonderful Christmas after all!

KABOOOOOONG!

I know it’s been a while…I’ll be back, I swear. Until then, watch this cartoon*.

*Thanks to Tenebrous Kate for her constant referencing of El Kabong…I was truly inspired.

WB Splatter

J Cauty & Son